Portal fantasy

In the first six seasons of Doctor Who (that's the First and Second Doctor episodes, if like me you had no notion at the time about TV seasons) the TARDIS control console was largely for show. Sometimes the Doctor claimed to have ended up where he intended, but he was either unable or unwilling (and probably both) to plonk his passengers back where they started. When Ian Chesterton and Barbara Wright blundered aboard, they had no idea of how long it would take for them to get back to Shoreditch in 1963.

Now suppose that's you. You've stumbled into what looks like an old police telephone box to find it's bigger on the inside. The doors, decorated on this side with huge roundels, are already closing. In a few moments the TARDIS will be dematerializing and if you go with it you might never return home (this being the First or Second Doctor, remember). Your friends and family won't have any idea what happened to you. So... will you jump back out? Or will you stay on board?

It's a variant on one of two what-if questions I'm fond of posing to party guests. Here's another one for would-be time travellers courtesy of the artist John Vernon Lord, grandfather of Inigo Hartas: you can go back to any year in history and be present as an observer at any place in that year. All languages are intelligible to you and you cannot be seen or touched. When would you pick?

If those have whet your curiosity, the Greater Good Science Centre at UC Berkeley has a whole bunch of questions like them. And here's another bit of Gedankenvergnügen while we're at it:

You may feel you'd rather just head down the pub, but if you want to join in please leave a comment.

And talking of waste...

It's been a very long time since I played in the world of Glorantha but, like Tekumel, it's another of roleplaying's famously detailed subcreations, and the way you present that so as to hook players is not by giving them the anthropology textbook or even the tourist's guide, but by immersing them in what it's like to live in that world.

The mistake there lies in telling, not showing. Bad writing is the cause of the rot in the case of much bigger IPs than Glorantha. Star Trek, Star Wars, and Marvel, for instance. Wokeness often gets blamed, but that's not the problem. Star Trek always espoused a liberal humanist ideology. The difference was that the writers used to know that if you want to embed ideas in a story, you have to explore those ideas through drama, not lecture the audience while trying to distract them with characters who talk like they're in a high school comedy. Author David R. Low explains all about that here.

A waste of a great concept

In 1975, Empire of the Petal Throne introduced roleplaying gamers to the world of Tekumel, a beautifully detailed fantasy setting that was the first of its kind to feature non-Caucasian characters in a society nothing like the usual Graeco-Roman or medieval world. In fact it was the first ever society of any kind to appear in a roleplaying game, D&D and its imitators up to that point being just "a medieval Wild West" whose society consisted of nothing but a shop to spend your loot in.

Tekumel’s creator, M.A.R. Barker, drew on inspiration from South-East Asia, the Middle East, China and Pre-Columbian civilizations without his world actually being like any of those cultures. The result was something very different from other RPGs – and from most American or European fantasy literature. What made Barker's creation so revolutionary in 1975 was its vision of entire civilizations that didn't look, think, or act like variations on medieval Europe. Barker’s greatest gift to the fantasy genre was showing us that other worlds could be genuinely other. That lesson feels more important now than ever. Paul Mason gives a taste of what I’m talking about here.

That’s not how Tekumel gamers (a small and dwindling group) usually get to approach the setting, though. For example, Bethorm is the name of one of many Tekumel-set RPGs that have appeared in the half-century since EPT. It’s also the Tsolyani word for a pocket dimension, apparently. But why do the Tsolyani have a word for "pocket dimension"? Why do they even have the concept? It can hardly be something an ordinary citizen would use in everyday life, after all.

Consider the real world. "Galaxy" was the Middle English word for the Milky Way. Nobody knew until the 1920s that we lived in one galaxy and that there are trillions of others. Nobody knew until the 1950s that the universe is billions of light-years across. We don't even now have single words for dark matter and dark energy, and they are observable (in the first case, anyway), so I'm stumped as to how even educated Tsolyani ended up coining a word for "pocket dimension".

One argument is that the Tekumel setting incudes “learning spheres” – find one, give it a twist, and you’re an instant expert in whatever was originally programmed into it. So if learning spheres are common, that means the technological know-how of yore need never have been lost. Tekumel would be like the world in Zelazny's Lord of Light, where most people think that gods and demons and magic are real, but the select few know that's all just a way of explaining science to the uneducated. And if you spoke to those select few they would know all about quantum theory, atoms, cybernetics, etc.

(There's actually a real-life equivalent of this, incidentally. When William Kamkwamba wanted to build a dynamo in his village in Malawi, he told the locals he needed to collect old bits of machinery "to do some magic" because he knew that's how they would interpret what he was doing.)

The trouble is, we’re told that learning spheres are used up when activated. And they were constructed at least 30,000 years before the present day. So I don’t think they’d be a significant factor in the education of the Tsolyani, certainly not to the extent of making the concept of pocket dimensions commonplace.

This opens up the question of how much magic is there in "real" Tekumel. I imagine a world where priests do a lot of rituals before and during a battle, and those rituals have a real effect on morale, and many soldiers will swear blind they saw miraculous things like lightning bolts, but in fact that's mostly in the mind. So this would be a low-fantasy world with no more magic than Westeros, not a pulp sci-fi setting with spells like phaser-blasts. I do realize this would be unpopular with Tekumel enthusiasts, but after all they are an endangered species. My Tekumel doesn't consist of characters discussing abstruse cosmic concepts like bethorms.

What would Tekumel look like if it were contemporary SF/fantasy rather than 1950s-influenced Planet Stories, a bit like the way Battlestar Galactica was rebooted? Most Tekumel fans seem to prefer the space opera version, a genre that was repopularized by Lucas in the '70s after all. They play games in which the rich culture of Tsolyanu, Livyanu and the other states is all but irrelevant. Instead player-characters gad about between bethorms encountering alien/human multidimensional politics and yammering about warp drive and gravity engines, while Barker's invented societies, so marvellously different from our modern world, are flattened into the same sci-fi mush you’ll see in a dozen fungible entertainment franchises. 

It makes no sense. Barker was a linguist and anthropologist and he describes wonderfully strange civilizations which he brings to life in minute detail. That's where Tekumel shines. He wasn't a scientist and his science fiction ideas are a dime a dozen. His SF is also typically mid-20th century Western in flavour, whereas the cultures he created don't resemble any historical setting, most especially not any Western one. Not that setting alone is enough to deliver a compelling story, especially not in an era of BookTok, celeb book clubs, and dopy romantasy sagas. You need characters you care about. But the setting is the environment they move in, and if it's off-the-peg then the situations are too. Lizzie and Mr Darcy's relationship means nothing outside the special context of Regency culture and socioeconomics. Jane Austen even starts the novel with an ironic statement about that.

If I were to reboot Tekumel, I’d throw out the “Doc” Smith space opera stuff and make it more about everyday life. Much less magic and much, much, much less whizzy technology. The Eyes wouldn’t have standard names; they’d be too rare for that. There wouldn’t be an internet of telepaths reliably sending messages across thousands of miles overnight. There’d be no thousand-year-old plans hatched in “pocket dimensions”, no routine encounters with robots and gadget-wielding aliens. I’d strip it all back to what really is unique and wonderful: the cultures that Barker created. As we look toward the future of fantasy gaming and fiction, his example reminds us of the beauty of diversity. The most memorable worlds aren't built on clever mechanics or exotic technologies. They're built on the patient work of imagining how people actually live, love, struggle, and die in societies radically different from our own. That's the kind of magic that never gets old.

If you want to get a head...

The first of the Fabled Lands Chapbooks series was Headcases, in which I referred jokingly to my predilection for flying head monsters. Well, I thought at the time it was a joke, but now I think I might have a serious problem. Two recent scenario books in the series, Oliver Johnson's It's Mostly Been Forgot and my own "The Honey Trap" (in Wizards of Tamor) both feature flying heads, and I just edited an old Questworld scenario by the two of us, One Night in Deliverance, and found that among the critters was an early form of the Dragon Warriors skullghast. (Though, to be fair, those Questworld skullghasts weren't quite just flying heads, they had a sort of ethereal body too.)

The only solution to my head obsession might be to go cold turkey -- or cold feet, rather. In my next scenario I'll try to include some disembodied lower extremities, and not a bonce in sight. I've been there before too, in this letter to the gentlemen of the Royal Mythological Society from Mirabilis: Year of Wonders -- but so far the heads are still way ahead in my oeuvre while the feet are trailing with that sole entry.

What will survive of us

If you're able to get into London over the next few weeks and you appreciate the works of John Whitbourn, one of the truly great writers of English fantasy and horror, you should check out his play He Was A Bugger But I Loved Him, renamed Labelled With Love (why?) as part of a double bill at the Old Red Lion Playhouse. Get your tickets here. There are no interdimensional pathways, no malicious fays, no macabre twists in reality -- but there's a deeper kind of fantasy in the mysteries of love and memory, and that's what's on display in the drama.

Theatre might be a new calling for Mr Whitbourn. He recently completed another play, The Hunt For Blunt, about Sir Anthony Blunt, Surveyor of the Queen's Pictures. Blunt turned out to be a Soviet spy, the so-called Fourth Man, and went to ground at Watts Gallery in Surrey when his cover was blown. That's where the play is set and where, with luck, it will be staged.

The early bird...

Alkonost have some very fine gamebook editions for French readers, as these gorgeous covers and interior maps show. And you can now pre-order books that will be officially released in October, and I'm told that pre-orders made now should be delivered as early as next month so you'll get them a full four months early. Do I need to say more?

Pit stop

In the library you find the first volume of How to Enter the Underworld. This book is the work of a man called Agrash the Explorer. You learn that the Underworld is the name for the shadowy realm of the creatures like the trau, and of demons and the dead – in short, Hell itself. It has many names: the Land of Roots, the Place of Direful Dreams, the Land Beyond the Dark Mirror, and suchlike. There are several ways in. There is rumoured to be a stairway to the underworld on the other side of the Peaks at the Edge of the World, far to the north. Sailors say you can sail into the underworld through the cave known as the Mouth of Harkun, north of Yarimura. The monks of Noboro monastery claim you can walk into the underworld from Akatsurai, simply by always heading in a north-easterly direction. Scholars of Dweomer claim an entrance lies at the very top of the peak on Starspike Island. Also, the tunnels of the trau are thought to lead inexorably downward into the Realm of Shadows. The end of the book refers to volume two in the series, entitled How to Get Out of the Underworld. You ask one of the archivists if this book is in the library, but he tells you it never got written. ‘Agrash the Explorer never came back to finish it.’

Can we still talk about spoilers for a book that’s been in the publishing equivalent of limbo for thirty years? Into the Underworld was to be the last book in the Fabled Lands series – or maybe the next-to-last, if the whispers about a thirteenth book could be believed.

Throughout the Fabled Lands series, there are plenty of ways for a doomed or daring adventurer to find their way into book 12. You might have had a character stranded there for years, so arguably book 12 is more of a priority than books 8-11, which would wrap up some quests from other books but are otherwise just expansion packs to extend the places you can journey to.

Here are those routes into the underworld. Look away now if you still have hopes of FL book 12 appearing eventually.

Book 2: Cities of Gold and Glory

You can be carried off to the underworld by the Trau:

Book 3: Over the Blood-Dark Sea

You could be lured to the underworld by succumbing to the mermaids’ song:

You might suffer some bad luck while failing to repel a pack of hellions: 

You might descend into a hole among the roots of a tree in the Bluewood on Braelak Isle:

Or climb down inside the hollow mountain on Starspike Island:

Or choose (perhaps unwisely) to dive down to a submerged city:

Book 4: The Plains of Howling Darkness

You can get to the underworld by sailing your ship into the treacherous cave known as the Mouth of Harkun:

Being sucked down by a gigantic whirlpool:

Being hauled into a tunnel by a hairy demon:

Boarding the silver barge at the celestial harbour:

Rapping on a stone slab in the side of a cliff if you aren’t sufficiently sanctified:

Book 6: Lords of the Rising Sun

If you take a misty road heading north-east from Noboro monastery you can walk into the underworld:

And another route is via a nexus of mysterious pathways that would make Einstein and Rosen tear up their maps:

Book 7: The Serpent King's Domain

It’s possible to get yourself teleported to the underworld by the capricious monkey god Shimae:

Fabled Lands Quests: The Castle of Lost Souls

Guided by a pair of enchanted boots, your character is led past the Haunted Hills and through a foul swamp known as the Sodden Blight, eventually descending under a vast ceiling of rock into the underworld. Here you must cross an immense, ashen plain illuminated by an unnatural orange light to reach your destination, the Castle of Lost Souls, fortress of the demon Slank. While navigating the underworld, there are specific environmental rules you must follow:

1. You must have a source of illumination such as a lantern to travel through the dark caverns
2. The oppressive nature of the realm means you must temporarily subtract 2 from your COMBAT score, although this penalty is negated once you actually step inside the Castle of Lost Souls

If you fail in your quest -- for instance, if the magic of your infernal boots fades before you can find Slank's castle -- you are given the option to remain in the underworld. If you have Book 12, you wander aimlessly across the ashen plain until you pass through a tunnel and see a "curious city" looming ahead. At this point, you turn to paragraph 689 of Into the Underworld -- the same place as the monkey god sent you in Book 7.

There's also a scene in The Plains of Howling Darkness (FL book 4) where you might get the opportunity to visit the halls of the death-god Nagil --and, even more importantly, the opportunity to leave again. That's presumably located somewhere in the underworld, though there's no obvious route directly into book 12.

What would the FL underworld be like? Perhaps taking a cue from Dante, I envisage it as existing on multiple levels, so your exploration would be more three-dimensional than in other regions of the Fabled Lands. Also, both Jamie and I have used underworlds in previous gamebooks: Sheol in Doomwalk, the fourth Blood Sword book, and Hades in The Houses of the Dead, the first in the Vulcanverse series. For Into the Underworld we'd have to tap a fresh vein of inspiration -- perhaps drawing on our Tekumel games, or going back to the Hippocrene springs that fed them such as Clark Ashton Smith and H.P. Lovecraft.

Up above the world so high

The Ghosts of the Magi, known colloquially as Pyid (= "the Five") are five small luminous bodies that hurtle through the night sky above Krarth. With a good eye they can be variously seen in other northern regions also, but it is above Krarth that they are brightest.

The peasants of Krarth believe them to be the spirits of the five greatest original magi, cast into the upper heavens by the Blasting of Spyte. The Five have specific astrological significance and are known by these names: Red Death, Blue Moon, Plague Star, Gift Star and White Light. The Krarthian peasants believe they will come into conjunction above Spyte in the year 1000 AS, whereupon the gates of that deathly city will be hurled open.

Astronomers of Khitai or the Ta'ashim lands, where the world is known to be round, could possibly map these moons' orbits and calculate any conjunction – though if such a thing has ever been attempted the results are not known.

The above is what any Dragon Warriors player would have learned from "The Lore of Legend" chapter in DW Book Six, way back in 1986. But as I worked on Jewelspider, my return-to-Legend RPG, I got to wondering: what is official Church teaching regarding the Ghosts of the Magi? 

It struck me that it’s not in the nature of religious thinking to say, “OK, there are these spirits of ancient sorcerers that are hurtling around under the vault of heaven soaking up ineffable secrets for their eventual return to Earth,” because that’s a scientist’s interpretation, like saying, “We accept the origin of these objects and will now try to work out what they are.”

But in fact the Church is likely to take a very different approach: “These things are evidently real. Therefore they must be part of God’s plan, and we can ignore what those heathens in Krarth believe.”

So then I got to thinking that if you put White Light to one side, that gives us four baleful entities – the Four Horsemen, obviously and handily. So then, with a little Wiki-level research, I found that official Church teaching until very recently is not that the Four Horsemen are agents of the Antichrist. Quite the reverse: they are God’s agents who will scour the world to usher in the Last Judgement. And the fifth one? White is associated with the Holy Spirit, so that’s rather a gift.

Hence we have the True Faith’s doctrine as to what those five cometary objects are. The Five (known as the Pentaphan) are regarded as angels who have been appointed to scour the earth at the End of Days, specifically as the Four Horsemen who presage the Apocalypse, and are commonly identified as Apsinthos (ie Wormwood, harbinger of War, replacing Red Death), Qaphsiel (Confusion and Sorrow, standing in for Blue Moon), Abaddon (Destruction, taking the place of Plague Star), Kushiel (Punishment, whom the Krarthians call Gift Star), and the last is thought because of its pure white light to stand for the Holy Spirit through the agency of the archangel Jophiel (Understanding and Judgement).

Light of the Kai rekindled

I'm accustomed to describing Vulcanverse or Blood Sword as "epic". Vulcanverse is as long as fifteen or sixteen Fighting Fantasy books. Blood Sword is equivalent to six or seven. But if you want a true gamebook epic, what about the thirty-two (and counting) volumes in the Lone Wolf saga?

Joe Dever left copious notes detailing how he planned to conclude the saga, and now his son, Ben Devere, and gamebook author Vincent Lazzari have teamed up to write that story. Light of the Kai is the first part of the Lone Wolf finale, the culmination of more than forty years of adventuring in the world of Magnamund.

Ben says: 

"We spent over two years piecing together Dad’s ideas, updating the mechanics, and staying true to his vision. It’s a real labour of love - and a way to say thanks to all the fans who’ve stuck with us. Expect familiar terrains, fresh challenges, and the same epic feel that made Lone Wolf so special."

Players can take a new character or play the part of Lone Wolf himself. (Or herself? I'm not sure if Lone Wolf's sex is ever given in the books...) The action takes the player into the forsaken north, where old foes stir and long-buried secrets await.

There will be a collector's edition, a standard hardback, and a limited number of signed copies. You can also order art prints by Gary Chalk. Yes, you read that right. Mr Chalk, the original and definitive illustrator of the Lone Wolf series, is returning to bring these final chapters of the story to life.

Find out all the details on the Magnamund site.

Seminar: "The AI Assisted Artisan Author"

The main reason I abhor terms like "AI slop" is that they are propaganda, not arguments. They are used as substitutes for thinking and reasoned debate. (It's the same mindset that coins slurs like "Crooked Hillary" and "Comrade Kamala"; "stochastic parrot" is another.) The fact is that some things generated by AI are slop but many are not - in physics, biochemistry, medicine, etc. Only a fool, given that the genie is out of the bottle, refuses to engage with it. Also there is, and always has been, plenty of slop that humans created for themselves without the help of AI. Just cast an eye over the bestseller lists.

AI art comes in for a lot of flak, not entirely unfairly. It's much more polished than anything I could draw. But it's only workmanlike; it's never great. The people who are quick to coin terms like "AI slop" have latched onto the claim that using AI art is putting human artists out of work. I can't speak for others, but if a project of mine has a budget then I want to work with human artists every time: Inigo Hartas on Jewelspider, Leo Hartas on Mirabilis: Year of Wonders, Mattia Simone on Vulcanverse, Russ Nicholson and Kevin Jenkins on Fabled Lands. I make sure they get paid even if (as often happens) I don't. No AI can do what they can do.

A lot of projects don't have budgets, though. Blog posts, for example. For a decade I'd have to trawl through mediocre public-domain images to find something to illustrate the week's piece. Now, in the absence of anything better, at least Gemini can whip up something passable. After spending an hour or two planning and writing a post, not having to waste half an hour scouring the internet for images is a godsend.

Most gamebook and RPG authors don't make any money. Their works are labours of love. After months of writing, when they were finally ready to publish, it used to be that their only option for illustrations was to find some out-of-copyright art. That could occasionally be just right -- who else but Gustave Doré could illustrate James Wallis's storytelling game The Extraordinary Adventures of Baron Munchausen? More often than not it was just the creator making the best of a bad job. They weren't putting a human artist out of a job, any more than you're paupering a plumber or carpenter when you do some DIY based on a YouTube instructional video, because there never was a job there in the first place. 

And incidentally there'd be no indie game scene at all if not for desktop publishing software and print on demand. Those came along more than twenty years ago. Do you see the streets lined with out-of-work typesetters and printers? No, and this technological revolution won't wreck anyone's career either.

So much for art. What about writing? AI is really not good at fiction. Its prose (learned from humans, of course) is ungainly. That would be hard to fix because elegant prose is not easily evaluated and so it would be hard to train a model to know the difference. It's not like coding or maths, where there's a clear difference between a right and wrong answer. (That's why, when teachers had to estimate their pupils' exam performance during the covid lockdown, there was much greater variance between the estimate and the eventual exam result for arts subjects than for sciences.)

Even if we could teach an AI to write beautifully, it couldn't (currently, anyway) write a good novel because it has no depth of insight -- though, again, that's true of many human authors. The telephone-directory-sized romantasy bestsellers stacked up in the bookstore window are not good novels, just popular ones. Lee Child's working method for writing the Jack Reacher books is effectively just what an LLM does, so there's no reason ChatGPT couldn't come up with a passable pastiche of one of those. But it's not going to rival Flaubert or Turgenev for a while yet. Owning a camera doesn't make you Da Vinci, after all.

I realize that in the 2020s there is no longer any possibility of convincing anybody that they might be wrong or even that somebody who disagrees with them isn't a knave, but maybe we can all still agree that it's better to be informed than not. That's why I'm recommending Joanna Penn's online seminars on ways to use AI to make you a better author. For the reasons given above, that doesn't mean prompting it with, "Write this novel for me." What Jo is covering includes the background tasks: deep research, brainstorming and ideas, outlining, structuring, plotting, and planning, characters and worldbuilding. For example, she explains how to use NotebookLM to maintain a world bible. (That would have saved months of wading through texts if it had been around when I was working on the Lyonesse RPG, for example.)

There are seminars on 16 and 23 May. I've taken Jo's seminars before -- even after 40+ years as a working author there's plenty I can still learn -- and they are worth every penny. Get your tickets here.

The Festival of the Shining Sun

Tekumel, because of the wealth of detail defining its laws, customs, mores and social structures, is immeasurably richer and more real a setting than any other I’ve played in. New players, used to more of a medieval Europe theme park environment, sometimes balk at its exotic names and ways of thinking: ‘How will I get my head around it all?’ Well, children don’t come pre-loaded with any culture either, and somehow they manage. In Tekumel gaming it’s why we usually start with a “fresh off the boat” set-up or a session zero in a location far from the main centres of civilization. With the Tekumel Sourcebook, The Eye of Allseeing Wonder, and Tirikelu you have everything you need to get started. Add Deeds of the Ever-Glorious and The Book of Ebon Bindings for extra spice.

Over the years my gaming friends and I have led whole parallel lives in the world of Tekumel. You’ll find its influence throughout ‘80s and ‘90s British gamebooks because the campaign roster included Jamie Thomson, Paul Mason, Mark Smith and Oliver Johnson. The Legion of the Sword of Doom in The Way of the Tiger? Look no further than Gruganu, Black Sword of Doom, the cohort of the god Ksarul, coupled with such Tsolyani regiment names as the Legion of Potent Destiny, the Legion of the Portals of Death, the Legion of the Night of Shadows, the Legion of the Storm of Fire, and the Legion of the Lord of Red Devastation.

When you have such a deep background, you can dive into a game with no preparation. The referee has to do almost nothing, in fact, as the player-characters drive the whole show. Players asked to sit out in another room continue to converse in-character. Adventures arise out of the goals the PCs set for themselves. Here’s a case in point. The characters were heading along the Sakbe from Bey Sű to to Sokatis. I had sketched a few notions that I could use as cues to the players for them to spin up into an evening’s events. For example:

Which led to the session of which this is the write-up:

As you arrived, preparations were being made for the Festival of the Shining Sun, dedicated to Hnalla’s second aspect. Chusun [Oliver Johnson] insisted on staying two days for the festival.

You took lodgings at the House of the Champion’s Rest, owned by Turuku of Mimore, an expat Salarvyani who obtained Tsolyani citizenship and is something of a local hero, having won a number of spectacular bouts in the arena until he retired five years ago.

Chusun visited the temple of Hnalla and made a lavish donation – his Excellent Ruby Eye with some 25 charges! This at least secured an audience with the Governor. You also spoke to the local police chief, Ssai hiMabran, a retired captain of the Legion of Hnalla. Chusun also gained admittance to an inner sanctum of the temple, where he saw the sun’s image focused on a pool of water and, disturbing it not by his breath, perceived sunspots that darkened the blazing disk.

Meanwhile, Tsamurel [Jamie Thomson] convinced Turuku to come out of retirement for one bout in the town’s quite impressive Hirilakte. The terms of the contest were to second injury. Tsamurel, to cover his bets, pawned the party’s Eye of Healing for 2000 Kaitars.

The festival began with an early morning contest. Young men of the town gather before sunrise to dive, swim the surging river, climb one of the tall swaying junkel trees on the far bank, swim back, and present an unbroken junkel nut to the Princess of the Sunrise, who by tradition is the prettiest local maiden. On this occasion the lucky girl was Eleara hiJefash, the Governor’s daughter.

Jangaiva [Mark Smith] and Tsamurel took part and was neck and neck with couple of local lads. Then Chusun noticed that one young fellow, Hogesh hiVurar of the Wooded Slope Clan, seemed to be cheating. Hogesh returned with some leaves stuffed inside a sheet (most contestants carried a sheet, net or sack) and swam into reeds where he previously hid a junkel nut the night before. When the deception was revealed, things looked bad for Hogesh and the crowd booed him, but Tsamurel (who was the legitimate winner) took the lad under his wing – in fact, went so far as to appoint him his second in the Hirilakte bout, which was scheduled for that evening.

There was a procession around the town, with Tsamurel riding as “Prince of the Sunrise” beside Lady Eleara, while Chusun chose instead to shave all his body hair and walk naked, beating himself with a whip and frightening the crowd with his enormous member, which seemed to become erect as he intensified his self-flagellation*.

Towards sunset, Chusun mastered his own Pedhetl, achieving momentary enlightenment into the inner mysteries of Hnalla’s second aspect**. He sat in the still-empty stands of the arena, and as people entered they took him for a holy man and gave him money and food in return for blessings.

Tsamurel and Turuku arrived, garbed as the champions of sunrise and sunset respectively. Tsamurel gave Hogesh the opportunity to address the crowd as his herald. Hogesh did so, putting just as much effort into singing his own praises as into bigging up Tsamurel, yet giving a stirring speech regardless that mollified the still-angry crowd. Only Chusun was not ready to forgive the young man for his attempt to cheat at the junkel nut contest – a naked, bald, seven-foot giant rose in the stands crying “Fraud!” and “False wretch, be silent!”

The duel began. Twice Tsamurel splintered Turuku’s mace, but each time stood back and called for a replacement before continuing the fight. Then Turuku scored a slight injury on Tsamurel. The bout was due to continue until either had taken two blows. As they fought on, Tsamurel’s mace broke and now Turuku called for another, joking to the crowd that they would soon have used up all the maces and might need to ask for a loan. Now Tsamurel wounded Turuku. It was all down to who would be injured next – and then, acting at precisely the same instant, both chose to attack and both blows drew blood.

A draw? The crowd could not allow it. Hastily conferring, Tsamurel and Turuku agreed to fight on until the next blow should decide the fray. After a furious exchange of attacks, parries and (on Tsamurel’s part) acrobatic dodges, Turuku’s mace struck home and Tsamurel’s legs buckled under him. He was back on his feet in seconds, both men bowing to the crowd. But Tsamurel was now 2000 Kaitars the poorer, and despite his 500 Kaitar share of the gate takings, has no way of redeeming the Eye of Healing from the temple.

In the evening, you heard rumours of a couple of burglaries that had occurred while everyone in town was watching the arena bout. This followed on from a spate of similar crimes that used to happen regularly years before, and were attributed to wandering woodfolk or puppeteers, but which had petered out in more recent times.

The next day, Chusun quizzed the Governor about the Black Ssu. The Governor's homeland turns out to have been the isles of Tsolei, and he told how the Black Ssu would raid the island to steal children who they bring up among them as "Non-Men" - humans who have been raised to serve the Ssu. He also mentioned what he knows of Hrugga, which is that Hrugga failed to give a gift to the demon brother Nurgashte because he couldn't afford anything of appropriate value after giving the scabbard of his fabled weapon, Kakara, to Bassa, king of the Black Ssu.

Meanwhile, Tsamurel met with Captain Ssai, offering to keep an ear open for news of the burglaries. On returning, he got into an argument with Turuku (the argument was all on Tsamurel’s side) when Turuku offered a gift of 500 Kaitars so that Tsamurel could redeem the Eye of Healing. Tsamurel, resenting the implication that he needed charity, tried to force Turuku into a rematch, but Turuku insisted he was now retired for good.

(In fact, the offer of 500 Kaitars would not have been enough. Tsamurel pawned the Eye for 2000 Kaitars and must pay back 2100 to redeem it, but only has 500 Kaitars – even if he’d taken the gift, that still leaves him 1100 Kaitars short. So you have probably lost both that and the Excellent Ruby Eye.)

* Hey, all I can say is that’s how Oliver chose to portray his character.

** There was a bit more background info that I gave in case any of the players wanted to delve into the religious aspects of the festival:

‘Hnalla’s Second Aspect is Chirashin Tulengkoi (literally "the Shining Sun") who gives his devotees surcease from care and freedom from grief or fear. He accepts only offerings of diamonds and other clear crystals. His priests and priestesses go nude except for necklaces, anklets, and bracelets made of ropes of crystals "hung about their persons, making each movement glitter and flash".

‘The most famous shrine of Hnalla's Second Aspect is in Jakalla. There, on his festival days, 9th Firasul and 4th Trantor, thousands of those whose lives have become sorrowful (the bereaved, crippled, those who have been shamed or paupered, etc) march in procession to his shrine. Miracles occur, souls are healed, and grieving hearts are filled again with joy on these days. [In the campaign it's currently around 22nd Drenggar, ie some 18 days to the 9th Firasul festival day.]

‘The "commonly known" or "outer" mystery of the Shining Sun's devotees, revealed to all lay followers such as yourself, is that the colours of the rainbow that a diamond makes from the pure white light of his disk are analogous to the things that make up all the rest of the universe. Each separate thing appears as having a single nature, but when all things are perceived at once, in their totality they are the light of the Shining Sun.

‘A deeper mystery is described by the priests as like gazing into a source of intense light. At first the light is dazzling, but gradually the eyes adjust and it is possible to make out some detail within the light source. In the same way, they say that those who receive initiation into the mystery cult of the Shining Sun can be taught to endure the light and will eventually have revealed to them the greatest mystery of all, which is to glimpse what is revealed within the source. Your own High Prelate of Hnalla in Bey Su, Chankosu hiMareda, is a special adherent of the Second Aspect and is rumoured to be an initiate to whom the mystery has been revealed.’

What ho, chapbooks

You may have noticed that Fabled Lands Publishing has been releasing a few chapbooks lately. First we had Headcases, a compendium of bodiless horrors to chill the blood of the staunchest adventurer. Then Dealing With Demons, the fondly remembered series from White Dwarf back in the 1980s. 

And now there's The Only Way Is Narnia, a parody one-shot that we ran on the blog a while back -- but that version was only for GURPS 4e, while the new edition also has stats for D&D 5e, Basic Role-Playing, and Powered by the Apocalypse.

If Not-Narnia doesn't tempt you, what about a sci-fi/Arthurian mash-up with a feminist flavour? That's The Girl King, also based on an old blog post but now with Dragon Warriors stats and some luscious Aubrey Beardsley illos. You might like to dip into an infiltration-&-heist adventure from the Vulcanverse books: The City of Bones. Then there's The God in the Bowl, a locked room murder mystery with inter-party tension, inspired by the Robert E. Howard short story. Monster Hunt is a rumbustious old-school creature fest. The Fall of the House of Missal is one of the scenarios that Oliver Johnson and I wrote for Games Workshop's never-published Questworld book more than forty years ago; the adventure appeared on the blog ten years back as "Sweet is Revenge" but we've now converted it from RuneQuest to Dragon Warriors. Or we've got Kwaidan, a spook-infested Bushido adventure from White Dwarf #47 but now with Dragon Warriors rules.

This is the perfect time to try the chapbooks because tomorrow (May 1st), for one day only, they're completely free. Get them here.

Also tiptoeing out to the bookshelves without any fanfare have been some colour hardback editions of selected gamebooks. So far we've got The Temple of Flame, Once Upon A Time In Arabia, and Down Among The Dead Men.

Just one more thing, as Columbo used to say -- Dagon Warriors (sic) is now available on Kindle. At 80 pages it's a bit big to call a chapbook, so let's say it's a mini-RPG. This is a completely self-contained reworking of the blog post and scenario that you may have seen here, but now with all the rules needed for running Cthulhu-style investigative adventures in the 1920s and 1930s.

Are there any other gamebooks for which you'd like to see a collector's edition? Or other scenarios or topics that would make a good chapbook? Let us know in the comments.

Punch drunk

"Fifteen years since I had to take out a Green Beret..." Oh, just fuck right off, Frank Miller. Why stop there? How about: "It's been fifteen years since I had to take out a Terminator" or "It's been fifteen years since I had to take out a Chitauri attack fleet"?

In Batman: Year One we've been wondering up till that point how little Jim Gordon is going to deal with Flass and the other corrupt cops in the Gotham police department. He'll have to be wily and determined. Seek out some allies with mutual interests. Get leverage over his enemies, maybe dig the dirt on them. Dissemble so that they don't suspect what he's up to. Judge who he can trust and who he can get on his side.

But no, none of that happens, because it would call for some very smart plotting. Instead let's have him be the very pinnacle of ex-special forces. Then he can just beat up Flass and that'll solve everything.

Same for Alfred the butler, who used to be an interesting contrast with his employer, like C-3PO and Luke, but has morphed into the young Bruce Wayne's sensei. Nowadays Galadriel has to be Hit Girl and Dalby in The Ipcress File is a Bond-level killer. Talking of Bond, M now has to have a background in the SAS (probably he joined the regiment at the same time as Alfred Pennyworth). Even Wednesday Addams, who should be so terrifyingly cool that she never needs to resort to combat, now has to be a martial arts whizz.

Making every supporting character ex-SAS or a SEAL is the same mentality that bungs all of Arthur Conan Doyle’s characters into one universe and expects a round of applause. It's the colour-by-numbers approach to imagination. When writers can’t think of clever ways for their heroes to deal with the problems they’ve given them, they use the cop-out that they are super-tough brawlers – as if that ever really solved anything. 

As an antidote to all this, look instead at Lizzie Bennet tackling Catherine de Bourgh with just a keen mind and moral courage. Or reflect on why Odysseus is a more interesting adventure hero because he overcomes problems with his wits rather than brute strength. That's why I liked The Penguin TV show. Oz Cobb is tough, but not Steve Rogers tough. He's only one man in a ruthless criminal world where there are plenty of stronger and faster adversaries. Outnumbered and despised, an outsider among Gotham's established crime families, faced with an ever-changing crisis where plans are constantly going awry, he has to be cunning and think on his feet.

It's a storytelling lesson I learned at the age of seven watching Goldfinger. Back in those early days 007 wasn't harder than a UFC champion. He was just ultra-resourceful. And when he takes out Oddjob, that was the moment that shows what it takes to tell a good story.

The glories of Orb

You may not have noticed, but the Way of the Tiger gamebooks recently got a mini-makeover. All six of the original books are now available in ebook format as well as in paperback, and there's a new series page on Amazon.

What's unique about the Way of the Tiger books is the range of gameplay styles covered. In the early books you're a stealthy assassin. Then you have to conquer a kingdom -- but not just that, in the next book you have govern it. Enemy city-states move against you, making the next book a complete wargame, firstly of strategic choices as you manoeuvre to bring your adversaries to battle, then a contest of nerve and tactics as you try to break them once and for all. The last of the original series circled back to solo adventuring, but this time in the form of classic dungeon delving.

The dungeoneering made sense because the glittering centrepiece of the series is the world of Orb, Mark Smith's setting for the D&D campaign he ran for his friends at school. There were no ninja in Orb in those days, just classic sword-&-sorcery tropes. Many of the NPCs who pop up in the books were player-characters in Mark's campaign, which was still getting talked about (and occasionally run) when I met him at college the following year. I remember holding the Book of the Gods of Orb, a school exercise book in which he'd detailed all the temples and cults of Orb. There were other books too, and more material got added as the campaign progressed over the years. We played long-term in those days, not just a dozen sessions and on to the next thing. Orb was a genuine epic loved by everyone who was privileged enough to play in it.

The good news is that you can get a taste of that brilliance by playing the gamebooks that Jamie Thomson wrote with Mark in the 1980s. And if the downbeat ending of Book 6 bothers you, there's a very good sequel by David Walters (Redeemer) that lets you get Avenger out of that web.

Fellow travellers in the Vulcanverse

As you explore the Vulcanverse you can acquire various companions to accompany you on your quests. The companion you travel with can make a big difference to events at a location. They not only give advice or help, they sometimes become part of the story themselves. You can only have one companion at a time, so it’s a decision that can fundamentally change what you experience in the game.

I’m thinking of producing a series of Vulcanverse guides for the players who are put off by the thought of exploring without some hints. The Companions Guide would be the first, featuring overviews like this.

Loutro

You first meet Loutro at a dilapidated lakeside shrine to Aphrodite in the south-east of the land of Notus. Though Loutro respects the goddess of love, he reveals himself to be the last initiate of Tethys, the almost-forgotten goddess of rivers.

Loutro is one of your most loyal companions, becoming a reliable and steadfast friend and maybe even more than that. But despite your relationship he never loses sight of his main goal, which is to pass on his religious training to you. If you walk with him along the course of the Great River, which is now just a dried-up gully across the desert, he instructs you in stages until finally you earn the title Initiate of the Tethysian Mysteries.

Devoted as he is to you, Loutro isn’t going to hang around once his goal has been achieved, so if you want to experience some of the other regions of the Vulcanverse in his company you need to resist his urging to undertake that pilgrimage along the river bed. Once he leaves you he’ll never be available as a companion again, though you might well meet him in the course of later adventures. In fact, it’s during one of those later encounters that he gives you the means to acquire another of your companions.

Once you know the secrets of the river goddess’s cult as an Initiate of the Tethysian Mysteries, you can perform a ritual that will radically and permanently change the landscape of Notus and have ongoing effects throughout the whole Vulcanverse. The ritual is one of the three labours of Notus that must be completed to open up the main storyline in book 5, so you’ll want to get to it eventually, but again there’s no need to rush things. Some locations will no longer be accessible after the ritual and others will open up. You might want to explore Notus for a while longer first – in particular the mines just north of the Iskandrian delta.

When you do get around to the ritual, you're going to need three sacred items: a conch horn, a green pearl, and a baby's rattle. As for where you can find those, that's a subject for another guide.

The cure for our ills?

Regular readers will already know I'm an evangelist for AI. And, yes, I'm aware there are risks, as with any new technology, but we are going to keep rubbing lamps and letting genies out. We just have to be careful how we deal with them. When he was setting up DeepMind, Sir Demis Hassabis was fond of propounding the vision: "Solve intelligence. Use intelligence to solve everything else." By everything he meant curing disease, solving the problem of controlled fusion, and all the other things that could make life on Earth a utopia.

Perhaps you are cynical about experts and/or multi-millionaires, but don't make the mistake of dismissing every member of a group on account of some bad apples. I know Demis personally (I used to work for him) and I assure you that he is motivated by a genuine vision of a better future. His delight in the workings of the universe, his ever-youthful curiosity, his humour, his intelligence, and his focus are the qualities that I think show human beings at their very best. For such men and women, the human adventure is just beginning.

I mention all this because there is a biography of Demis Hassabis just out. That's The Infinity Machine: Demis Hassabis, DeepMind, and the Quest for Superintelligence by Sebastian Mallaby. Hassabis is likely to be admired by future generations as a pioneer of a new era -- long after the likes of Musk and Trump are forgotten -- and, though I think the key to AGI might lie more in the work of Yann LeCun, and though I believe we should celebrate discoveries, not discoverers, anyone who is interested in the lives of those who shape history should take a look.

There is a depressing note. (It's the 2020s, so how could there not be?) Recently Demis seems to be cooling on the grand vision. “I’ve satiated that scientific desire for the moment…I’ve always been fine either way,” he says, justifying the shift in emphasis from AGI research to the LLMs that are where the money is now. It figures that Google isn't interested in idealistic research; it just wants commercial product. If it were me, I'd walk away. Demis is probably reasoning that maybe he can do more good with 1% of Google's focus than with 100% of the resources of an obscure research lab. Such compromises with the inevitable never work out. You never even get that 1%. The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

AGI, superintelligence, and the keys to a utopian future are all achievable in theory. Of that I'm almost certain. But whether the societies and institutions humans have created will ever allow us to reach that goal remains an open question. The fault is not in our science but in ourselves.

Things Man Was Not Meant To Know

After the unveiling of the Dagon Warriors rules and the recent investigative scenario*, Teófilo Hurtado asked me how we would represent characters like Arthur Jermyn. The staple protagonist of a Lovecraftian story is not, after all, a two-fisted bruiser or a swami with mind control, simply a fellow of ordinary prowess and sometimes with an academic bent. OK, then...

The Scholar

Scholars are learned investigators and antiquarians who delve into forbidden knowledge and ancient mysteries. Unlike other professions that rely on physical prowess or psychic powers, Scholars use their extensive education and research skills to overcome supernatural threats. Their deep study of esoteric lore has granted them unusual resistance to mental intrusion, but at the cost of combat effectiveness.

Minimum Requirements: Intelligence 12+, Psychic Talent 9+

Starting Stats:

• Health Points: 1d6+4
• Attack 11, Defense 5
• Psychic Attack 0, Psychic Defense 6 (enhanced mental resistance)
• Evasion 3
• Stealth 13, Perception 7

Progression:

• Attack/Defense: +1 at 4th rank, then +1 at 7th, 10th, etc.
• Health Points: +1 at 2nd, 4th, 6th, etc.
• Psychic Defense: +1 each rank, with additional +1 at 4^th, 7th and 10th ranks
• Evasion: +1 at 5th, then +1 at 9th rank
• Stealth: +1 at 4th, then +1 at 7th, then +1 at 10^th
• Perception: +1 per rank

Special Abilities

1st Rank Abilities:

• Linguistic Analysis: Can attempt to decipher unknown languages, codes, and ancient inscriptions. At 1^st to 3^rd rank the Scholar will always be able to translate at least one important phrase. At higher ranks they can additionally interpret a percentage of the text equal to 1d10x their rank, though this usually takes a few hours.
• Historical Research: Exceptional knowledge of historical events, antiquities, and academic sources
• Psychic Resilience: Starting Psychic Defense of 6 instead of the normal 5

Higher Rank Abilities:

4th Rank: Academic Network - Can locate rare books, expert consultants, and obscure information through academic contacts.

6th Rank: Rapid Analysis - Can quickly assess supernatural threats and identify weaknesses through cross-referencing folklore and historical accounts.

8th Rank: Theoretical Construction - Can design and (given sufficient time and resources) build devices based on historical accounts and mythological descriptions. Examples include Eilmer's wings, Greek fire, siege engines from ancient texts, or protective talismans based on folklore.

10th Rank: Masterwork Construction - Can create sophisticated devices combining multiple historical techniques, such as mechanical calculators (such as the Antikythera mechanism), advanced Babylonian optics, or complex timing mechanisms using ancient mathematics and astronomy. (Cf gadgeteers in GURPS 4e.)

Scholar Skills

Scholars gain expertise in the following areas as they advance, beginning at journeyman level and becoming fully proficient by 5th rank:

• Languages: All known ancient and modern languages (Latin, Greek, Sanskrit, etc.)
• Archaeology: Understanding of ancient civilizations and their technologies
• Occult Theory: Academic knowledge of supposedly supernatural phenomena (without the ability to practice it)
• Research: Exceptional ability to find information in libraries, archives, and academic institutions

Combat Limitations

Scholars’ strength lies in preparation, research, and the construction of useful devices rather than direct confrontation.

What's Real and Make-believe?

The premise of the game is that extraterrestrial civilizations and other-dimensional entities first visited the Earth hundreds of thousands of years ago. Some of these creatures were worshipped as gods by primitive man. Over the millennia, the few definite facts have been distorted, misreported and added to until the field of “mythos lore” today bears little resemblance to reality. Those who imagine themselves to be perpetuating the ancient worship are like modern druids fancying they are continuing traditions from before the Roman conquest by mustering at the far more ancient site of Stonehenge. The prayers that cultists offer to Cthulhu are unheard, if indeed Cthulhu even exists as a single being, and would not be answered in any case.

That doesn’t mean that study of the Cthulhu mythos is not worthwhile. Consider Bible studies. Knowledge of the Old Testament will not tell you anything about the history of the universe, or even just the solar system, or provide useful insight into medicine, hygiene, nutrition or ethics, but nevertheless it is a valid academic subject. Similarly, Cthulhu mythos lore is largely a study of the many fabrications made over the centuries, the truth often being unknowable, but it is valuable for the Scholar to know about those beliefs because the actions of cultists who venerate Cthulhu and other such beings are predicated on such beliefs being true.

Design Notes

The Scholar's enhanced Psychic Defense progression provides significant protection against the mental attacks common in Cthulhu Mythos scenarios. Their construction abilities offer unique problem-solving options that complement rather than replace the combat abilities of other professions. At higher ranks, a Scholar might construct a collapsible glider, a defensive smoke bomb, or even a primitive spacesuit—all potentially invaluable tools for 1920s investigators facing supernatural threats.

Stats for an Average Scholar

*For traditionalists, here is a downloadable version of the "Abnormal Growths" scenario with Call of Cthulhu stats.